I always get into bouts of creative energy- kind of being on a elongated sugar high (see: day after Halloween/Christmas/Valentines Day when you stock up on 50% off chocolate and candy) which tends to last for a few days until I get stuck. Just like that sugar high, I come crashing down and so do all of my ideas. I can't even seem to write about my day- the crippling fear of judgement comes back in huge ways- in a similar way as the sugar high... except I never come down. This was kind of numbed in 2016- I learned how to push past the nervousness and just press 'post' whether or not the material is considered to be 'good'- if it's bad, if it's complete trash, the feeling of posting allows you to finally be finished with a piece. It allows you to share your work with the world and move on to different material. It's one month and 14 days into 2017 and I've forgotten what that feels like. My creativity is still stuck in 2016- unable to make the leap to this brave new world.
I remember thinking to myself, "Wow I cannot believe it's 2015... sometimes I still catch myself writing 2010 as the date on papers!" after which I would quickly erase, frazzled at the idea that I would write 2010 on a university based paper. I did not expect to have such a whirlwind year filled with endless [...]